Peaceful fighting and Canadian beavers

It matters not how well things are planned, execution still takes time and energy. This week was that week, except it was my personal life that consumed the week. And I have to say I’m tired.

This week plan A called for me being deep in the mountains by Boston working on self tuneup but instead I ended up in the depths of snow in Calgary, going to court to get my daughter back to where she belongs. So, this is something I hoped that wouldn’t come to be. But as the saying goes “it is what it is” and now I follow a different path. I don’t want to get into deeper details here but I do want to share some lessons learnt.

Exhausting all peaceful ways of resolving conflict is necessary. It’s only once all peaceful ways are exhausted, can you peacefully fight.

When committing to a fight, consider all other alternatives – all possible outcomes – and don’t think in tactical sense but in strategic sense. If long term outcome results in peace, short term turmoil is justified and warranted.

Once you start on a path – you finish it. Don’t hold back. Finish the job. As Sun Tzu say ” A wounded enemy only comes back to kill you the next day.”

Another lessons I have learned is that in my life I have so far negotiated with people and business where for most part both parties wanted similar things. A whole different set of skills and tools is needed for those time when negotiating with parties that want to get a win/loose outcome. I will share those later – but let’s say that for those times the win/win techniques need to be forgotten as they don’t help.

So, the good thing about all this is that even though I was preoccupied with my personal affairs this week, the business side continued well.

The pitch for RedStores is finished and looks good. We are ready for mothers day, salary reviews have been done, accounting is on it’s way and our numbers are doing well. We hired few new people. I’m returning to Beijing this week and my trip to Kucci will need to be rescheduled. Nevertheless I had outsourced meal plans on Elance a while back just incase and will be getting a new house keeping as soon as I’m back to cook for us in a healthy Kucci way. So, even though I had to go to Plan B – I’m still on track for what I want to accomplish.

It was nice to be back home in Canada, but it also really allowed me to become quite observant about Canadians in general. It would see Canadians like to:
1. Really work on their homes, building, creating and improving. Hmm – maybe the beaver symbol for Canada is well justified. Canadians are a nation focused on constant home improvements.
2. Canadians like to spend a LOT of time saving SMALL money. It seems to be a cultural habit to try to save money – it seems not truly for the money but rather culturally people are just conditioned to be happy to get “good deals”, drive 15 min longer to get 30 cent gasoline savings. Hey – I used to do that myself – driver longer so I would get a free coffee cup. I though then that free was good and the more the better. Now possessions mean much less but non the less I get the motivations of people.
3. Canadians are nice, friendly and without a lot of pretense. They are in general who they are (little beavers and big savers of small amounts) but they like it – and they are happy with it. And who can argue with that.

So, looking culturally at my roots I see that I have significantly shifted in terms of Canadian values (beaver/saver). But in a way I like to think I retained a part that is nice and that is being who you are and being just fine with it.

So, even thought it was a rough week I’m very happy at the clarity and peace it had offered me.

And here is me with my buddies cute cute daughter – Emily

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